Q96–Mother, Daughter: “I Can Feel Again”
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It is a terrible feeling to be lost from yourself. Deb Milam’s youngest daughter was so happy as a baby, but then gradually that changed until she became unrecognizable as her formerly pleasant self. She just started to get sick. She had learning disabilities and couldn’t focus and “it all went downhill from there.” She’d scribble instead of draw, act out in frustration and anxiety.
Deb hoped that her daughter would just outgrow the problem, but instead year by year her bipolar tendencies got worse. When she became a teenager, they hoped that it was just being a teenager, but the problems were too big to write off. Unsafe behavior. The inability to finish anything, no matter how hard she tried. Dramatic mood shifts so she was swinging up and down. She was angry and bratty, entitled and unhappy. She’d act out and then have a memory lapse. Something would happen and she would change the story in her mind.
Psychologists said she had a sequencing problem, meaning there’s a sequence of events and you put things in that don’t really belong there. To others it just appeared she was a liar. By the time she was in high school, she was desperately sick. She saw several hospitalizations, times when she ran away and couldn’t remember who she was.
Deb said, “I was worried she would never function as a human, that she would never be able to live a happy life, work at a job or drive a car. We were unsure that she’d be able to do anything or even go to college on her own
With the trauma of a very sick daughter, Deb was affected, too. For years, as she watched her daughter suffer, her own depression set in. It was a post-partum depression, she said, that never went away. “When you are down so long,” she said, and you never come up, you just get numb. I didn’t have any emotions. Life was just survival for me.”
She lost the self-confidence to do many things. She didn’t look forward to anything. She could go to some place that should have been as fun as a nice trip and she just couldn’lt enjoy it.
Deb started exercising to help herself, but with her daughter so sick and acting out in unsafe ways, she was too nervous to stay away from the phone. “I felt I had to keep an eye on her,” Deb said.
“I just figured the rest of my life would be like that. It was just this way, and that was it.”
Then someone introduced her to Q96 the micronutrient formula that is designed as a natural remedy for healthy brain function. Deb wanted to give it to her daughter, but decided the best thing to do was try it first herself. “I wasn’t going to give it to my daughter if it didn’t work, and within five days, I knew it worked. I have taken it every day since then.”
She said, “I started to feel emotions again. I had felt numb for so many years, I could scarcely believe it. I started to feel better. I was more peaceful, more competent and more focused as I continued to take Q96.
“Over time, I began to do things that I hadn’t been able to do like cooking and cleaning. I am getting my life back,” she said, “and I never thought that would happen. Now I can do things that I thought I’d left behind forever.”
When Deb felt assured about Q96, she gave it to her daughter, who was so much worse off than herself. She began to notice a difference in her within a couple of weeks. “As long as she takes Q96 she is very articulate, very functional, very polite and a joy to be around. We can see that it works.”
But Deb said, a therapist her daughter sees was wary of Q96, and she stopped taking it. Her healthy situation began to reverse itself again. Deb said, when she takes the Q96, “We can see that she is better. When shee doesn’t, we can see her situation deteriorate. Not taking it is not good for her.”
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Christmas with 32 Fingers and 8 Thumbs
A little creativity and Christmas cheer from The Piano Guys:
Mutton Chops
People often ask me why I look like I do, so let me explain. My two youngest daughters wanted to try out for the local production of A Christmas Carol, so I joined them for some father daughter time. As we filled out the paper at auditions, it asked what part we would consider. I put that I would be happy with no part at all and could just work on my next book while I waited for my daughters. But, I wrote, if they had a small part that needed to be filled, I would help out.
They asked me to read the part for Scrooge, and I did. Later that evening they called and asked me to come for callbacks. I did, and the next day I received an email asking me to take that part.
I had to consider it for a while. I had just had knee replacement surgery, and, besides spending lots of time in therapy, I was still in a lot of pain. In addition, I had extra work at the university, and was also trying to prepare my next book for publication. As I took the few days allotted for me to respond, one of the people in charge said they hoped I would take the part because Scrooge needed to be mean, and I was the only one who acted mean enough. I wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not, but I did decide to take the part.
Once I had accepted, I was asked if I could grow muttonchops for it. For those who don’t know, chops are long sideburns to the chin. Because I work at a religious university with a dress and grooming code where chops are not allowed, it took a little time to get permission. But, within two weeks, the chops had come in thick, I felt that I already looked really stupid, and I still had months to go.
I teach music to the children at the church I attend, and they hadn’t seen me for those two weeks, so they were curious as to why I looked like I did. “Well,” I joked, “I am in a play, and back in that time period, men would compete to see how ugly they could get.”
One darling little four-year-old excitedly worked to get my attention. When I called on her, she spoke enthusiastically. “You are doing a good job. I think you’re going to win.”
My students at the college started calling me Wolverine, and I didn’t even know what that meant until one of them brought me a picture from X-Men.
One Sunday afternoon I laid down for a nap. In the middle of it a fly landed on my newly grown whiskers. In my sleep I reached up to swat it away. In doing so my hand brushed my new facial hair, and, in my sleepy state, I thought some kind of caterpillar was crawling on my face. I grabbed it and pulled, and the pain brought me completely out of my sleep.
When my daughter and her children came to visit from California, my three-year-old grandson looked at me and said, “Grandpa, you look…” He paused, so I filled in. “Stupid?” He nodded. “Yeah.”
When my twenty-two-year-old son came home from college for Thanksgiving, he looked at me and just started laughing, unable to talk. People that I know, and say hi to, just stare at me. Others, knowing where I work, ask if I have retired, and I’m not that old.
And today, I went to pick up my daughter. She was at an after school activity. I parked the van and went in to tell her I was ready to go home. I finally found a group in the cafeteria that looked like it might be hers. As I approached them, one girl in the group turned and stared at me. She then turned back to the others and said, “Don’t look now, but there is a really creepy guy here.” My daughter poked her head up above the group, saw me, and called out, “Hi, Dad.”
But I’m a grown man, so why would looking like this bother me? I mean, I only have thirteen days, five hours, and twenty minutes until the end of the last performance when I can shave them off, but who’s counting?
How to Grill in Your Oven
During the warmer months, when the kids come home, we’re likely to turn the grill on and cook burgers, brats, or chicken on the deck. Now the colder weather has chased us in. But that doesn’t mean we have to give up grilling; we can do it in the oven.
Grilling in the oven is like cooking on the grill with the lid down. Just as the lid on the grill captures the heat so that your food cooks from the top and the bottom, so does the oven door. Use a rack so the heat can circulate under the food, and you’ll rarely have to turn the meat you’re cooking. Use aluminum foil to catch the drippings and you’ll have very little clean-up.
What’s the difference between grilling in your oven and baking in your oven?
Sure you can put your meat in a pan and stick it in the oven. The juices will flow from the meat and create the pool that your meat is cooking in. Grilling in the oven allows the juices to drop through to some sort of catch basin below, dropping through just like they do out on your deck. Grilling in your oven is not “wet” cooking.
If you put the meat in a baking dish, the dish inhibits the hot air from getting under the meat. Additionally, the pan is going to reflect the heat. Often, to capture the heat and have the food cook more evenly, you put a lid on your pan. The lid captures the steam, and you’re steaming the food.
All it takes to grill in your oven is the right kind of pan.
What’s the difference between broiling in your oven and grilling in your oven?
You might have a two-part pan intended for broiling in your oven. It has holes in the top part of the pan where you put the food, and the pan beneath acts as a catch basin. Broiling in your oven is like cooking on your grill with the lid up-except the heat is coming from the top, not the bottom. The oven door is left ajar so that the oven doesn’t catch the heat, and the food cooks from the radiant heat from above. The results are very similar to cooking on your grill with the lid up. And for everything but the thinnest pieces, you will need to turn the meat.
Grilling in your oven is cooking your meat from the top and the bottom at the same time. The oven door is closed.
There is nothing wrong with broiling food in your oven. It’s just different. For us, the disadvantages are that we usually have to turn the meat and the oven door is open. Still, it can be quick and effective.
What to Use for a Pan
We improvise. We use a cooling rack and a baking sheet. Our 11 x 17-inch baking sheets have a one-inch high rim. Our large cooling racks, what we use for cookies, are 11 x 17-inches also and the legs fit inside the baking sheets perfectly. The racks don’t slip around in the pan, which is convenient, and the hot air passes through the rack to cook the bottom of the meat. Before assembling the rack and pan, we line the pan with aluminum foil for easy clean-up. We simply throw the aluminum foil away and brush the rack clean before the food has a chance to dry on.
The cooling racks that we sell are chrome plated, not stainless steel. Some feel that stainless is safer than chrome, that chrome may taint the meat. We’re not scientists, and we have found statements saying that chromed steel is safe and that it isn’t. We can’t find any stainless cooling racks. But for us, we’re comfortable using chromed steel.
You’ll have to decide whether chromed steel is safe.
If you don’t want to use a chromed steel rack, use a grilling pan. Grilling pans come in two pieces: A top piece with holes so that the drippings will fall through and a bottom pan to catch the drippings.
You won’t get the same air circulation under the meat with a grilling pan as you get with the open grate of a cooling rack. If there is not enough hot air under the first pan to cook the meat evenly, prop the rack up so that more air can flow under the meat. The handle of a table knife or other utensil propped between the two pans in each corner should create enough air flow to equalize the temperatures. See the image to the right.
See nonstick and stainless steel grilling pans here.
How to Grill in the Oven
Here’s the general method for grilling in your oven with very little clean-up.
1.Line a baking sheet with foil. Set an oven-safe rack on theYou should have at least an inch of air space between the rack and pan.
2.Set the oven shelf to the upper third of the oven.
3.Preheat the oven.
4.Set the meat on the rack and place the pan with rack in the oven.
5.With the oven set on “bake,” cook until done.
That’s all there is to it. Once you know your cooking times, you can just set the timer and walk away. There is no cooking over a hot stove, no grease splatter, and little clean up. It’s easy.
Prepared Pantry has recipes for grilling burgers, steaks, and shish kebabs in the oven.
Turning the Hearts: Putting Christ Into Your Christmas Genealogy
The Chaos Called Christmas
It’s that time of the year again in America. The remains of the Turkey have been packaged and stored in the refrigerator to await its various post-holiday reincarnations. The end of Thanksgiving signals the official beginning of the Christmas Season with the advent of Black Friday. In 1966 the Philadelphia Police Department coined the term to describe that dark and desperate day after Thanksgiving when stores reduce their prices, initiating the annual holiday purchasing frenzy that lasts until The Day memorializing the Three Magi delivering their precious gifts to a small child in Bethlehem. And then the feeding frenzy starts all over again as the recipients of these annual gifts return their merchandise for something they really want. Such is the chaos of Christmas that greeted us as we checked out the TV news and weather forecast for our holiday travel home from Grammy’s house this year.
In addition to the television discussions on Black Friday, we were subjected to the seemingly life and death struggle for retail as commerce moved the holiday shopping season to Thanksgiving Day as they invaded this once-safe family haven. As reporters compared Internet vs. Big Box store sales and we mourned the loss of Thanksgiving, we found ourselves numbed by the over 500 listings for special Christmas shows that ran the gamut from affairs of the hearts, tornado disasters, and war deaths to the occasional song fest and re-enactment or more blatantly – reinterpretation of the Nativity. More often than not, many of productions portrayed people overcoming difficult times, and becoming nice and endearing; but almost none of them focused uon, and even avoided, mentioning Jesus Christ or the purpose of His mission to mortality that led to the celebration of Christmas.
What Does Christmas Mean To Me?
As I pondered the uproar and discord of what should be the most reverently-regarded time of man’s yearlong pursuits, I focused on the mission of Jesus Christ and what His coming to mortality means to me. I considered how it applied to my activities as a member of the Savior’s Eternal Family.
As a Latter-day Saint, we know that Jesus Christ came to Earth in the name of, and representing our Heavenly Father. He came to prove Himself as a faithful emissary of God, to take upon Himself the sins of all mankind, and become the Redeemer and Savior for all of Heavenly Father’s Children. In doing this He suffered incredible physical, mental, and spiritual pain, and eventually death to accomplish His Father’s purposes. We know His Living, His Atonement, His Dying, and His Resurrection provide the means for all men to return to God through faith, and grace, and obedience to His Commandments. Whenever I think of this great sacrifice, I realize that while He knew who I was in the vastness of Heaven, as a mortal being two millennia ago He was willing to take upon Himself the incomparable burden of the sins of mankind, including mine, to provide the opportunity and reality of repentance to me and all who have lived, live now or will every live, so we can someday return home to our Heavenly Parents who love us.
When I think on this, all I can do is to weep for joy and thankfulness that my Savior loves me so much, that He loves us all so much, and that we are all brothers and sisters in this great Family of Man. How can the World be so blind to such a blessing available for all? And I think, how can I be so blind to His sacrifice and not do something to honor His love, His legacy and His covenant?
1 Peter 4:6
As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we know we have been given a solemn assignment to share the Gospel. God’s Plan of Happiness is to bring the fullness of the Mission of Jesus Christ to all mankind, not just for our family, our friends and our neighbors, but also for our ancestors, for all on the Family Tree of Man. In 1 Peter 4:6 we read, “For this cause was the gospel preached also to them that are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.”
We have been placed under covenant with our Lord and Master to seek out all of our forefathers and extended families, to share the message of the Gospel with them through service. And what this service? We are simply asked to identify our family, gather their records, and provide their names for temple ordinance work, wherein they can receive (by proxy) the baptisms, cleansings, and sealing ordinances that are the Gateway to our Heavenly Father. Our ancestors are dead, but we know their eternal spirits live on in a heavenly home and have been promised the opportunity to take upon themselves these ordinances that we perform for them here in mortality. They await that glorious day when they will stand before God the Father and His Son Jesus Christ to be judged like men in the flesh, according to their obedience and faith and the Grace of God as eligible for Eternal Glory.
My Christmas Gift of Genealogy
With this thought in mind, my Christmas gift and goal is to find the information about a Gleason ancestor and his family to provide them with their needed temple work. They lived from the 1820’s to the 1880’s. I have gathered records and documented details about their births, their marriages, and their deaths. I have learned about their occupations, their faith, their earthly sacrifices, and have come to love them through my prayers and faith in my Savior Jesus Christ. I am compiling their family data on family group records to submit them to our family LDS temples where these eternal ordinances can be completed. As my heart turns to my Father in Heaven in prayer, I also ask that my testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ be shared with these beloved family members. Someday, I know I will meet them when I return to the Spirit World after leaving this mortality. I hope to share my love and testimony with them then in person, and receive their love as well.
After all, Christmas isn’t about me or my wants or needs; it is about doing all that I can do to help bring my family back to the presence of our Heavenly Father, through our Savior, Jesus Christ. Christmas is about putting Christ into my genealogy.
James W. Petty, AG, CG, is the Board-Certified and Accredited Professional Genealogist, “Climbing the Family Tree Professionally, Since 1969”. He is President of HEIRLINES Family History & Genealogy, Inc. (www.Heirlines.com), the “Salt Lake City, Utah BBB Accredited Business” trusted professional genealogy research services firm, providing US and International genealogical and historical research for a world-wide clientele.
For Heirlines-Quality professional genealogy services, resources, and products including expert family tree research, LDS family history assistance, and answers to genealogy questions, please see Jim’s website <a href="https://www.
heirlines.com”>www.Heirlines.com and his blog ProfessionalGenealogy.com. Heirlines: We professionally identify and document ancestry and kinship relationships and verify and certify the family tree with Certified Family Trees and Certified Forensic Genealogy Solutions. We’re ready when you’re ready!
Paul’s Missionary Handbook
As the Church has emphasized the need to hasten the work of salvation, my thoughts have turned again and again to the scriptures and to the important messages about how this work ought to be done.
I am studying Paul, and I continue to marvel at the way he performs this work, and his determination to do it right!
I think the best handbook on missionary work in the scriptures in the Bible is in 1st Thessalonians, chapters 1 & 2. The descriptions of Paul as a missionary are not as dramatic as those of Ammon and his brethren, but I believe they teach a better collection of missionary attributes. Here are fifteen of them:
1. 1: 2–We give thanks to God always for you all. Missionaries, full-time and members alike are always grateful for the golden contacts, the responsive investigators, and particularly for those whose lives have been changed by faith on the messages of the restored gospel. The word always is important. Paul, in the midst of his continuing tribulations never forgets to give thanks for the privilege of serving, and for the multitude of joys associated therewith.
2. 1:2–Making mention of you in our prayers. This is more than gratitude. Missionaries pray for their investigators and converts, for their ability and willingness to repent, for their continued faithfulness, for their steadiness and diligence in the “kingdom. When investigators are trying to repent and in need of spiritual sustenance, missionaries usually pray harder for them than they pray for themselves, and fast for and with them too. Elder Ballad and others have suggested that we ought to pray for opportunities to teach and for those the missionaries are teaching.
3. 1:5–For our gospel came not unto you in word only, but also in power, and in the Holy Ghost. Remember that the sons of Mosiah taught with the power and authority of God (Alma 17:3), and that Nephites preaching angered the Nephites, “even because he had greater power than they…” (3 Nephi 7:17,18). Power comes from faith in Christ (Moroni 7:33), and power in preaching comes from the Holy Ghost. Paul and his companions preached the gospel with power. We must seek this power, pleading with the Lord to enlighten us and speak through us to those who need our message.
4. 1:5-–Ye know what manner of men we were among you for your sake. Ammon and his brethren, the record says, “were treated as though they were angels sent from God to save [the Lamanites] from everlasting destruction.” (Alma 27:4) Missionaries stand out. And it is not just the white shirts and ties. People willing to share the gospel really are different, and anyone who gets close enough will notice it. I remember seeing this glow, this uniqueness when I took my son and his companion to lunch in California a few years ago, with the Mission President’s permission. I looked at them in the back seat of my car and I began to cry. They seemed like angels to me.
5. 2:2–We were shamefully entreated at Philippi. At Philippi, Paul and Silas were both beaten and imprisoned. But when they were freed, they immediately travelled to Thessalonica and commenced anew to preach the gospel. This reminds me of the experience of Aaron and his brethren at Middoni. When Ammon and Lamoni arrived to free them from the prison there, they found that they “were naked, and their skins were worn exceedingly because of being bound with strong cords. And they also had suffered hunger, thirst, and all kinds of afflictions; nevertheless they were patient in all their sufferings (Alma 20:29). When “they were delivered by the hand of Lamoni and Ammon . . . they were fed and clothed. And they went forth again to declare the word. . .” (Alma 212:14,15).
The Lord warned the Lamanite missionaries about the possibility of these kinds of experiences when he charged them to be “patient in long-suffering and afflictions that ye may show forth unto them good examples in me” (Alma 17:11).
Likewise, the Lord said of Paul to Ananias, “For I will show him how great things he must suffer for my name’s sake” (Acts 9:16). Missionaries must be willing to be shamefully entreated’ in order to spread the word. They must endure the rocks and the spitting and the name-calling; even the beating and the incarcerations, if necessary, to preach the word. And when it is over they must go forth again.
6. 2: 2–We were bold in our God to speak unto you the gospel of God. No timidity is allowed. We bear the most important message in the universe and we must present it with power and enthusiasm. And we must share it at every opportunity. Look at Paul’s efforts in Acts. Paul preached by a riverside (16:13), in prison (16:23), in a house (16:32), in many synagogues (for example see Acts 17:17), in all the coasts of Judea (Acts 26:20), on Mars’ Hill (Acts 17:22), In the market (Acts 17:17), in a certain man’s house (Acts 18:7), over all the country (Acts 18:23), in the school of Tyrannus (Acts 19:9), in a Sacrament Meeting (Acts 20:7), from house to house (Acts 20:20), on the stairs (Acts 21:40), in the castle (Acts 23:1), in the Judgement Hall (Acts 23:35), on a ship (Acts 27:21-26), and in his own house in Rome (Acts 23:30-31).
Alma 26:29 tells us that the Lamanite missionaries taught in the houses, in the streets, on the hills, and in their temples and their synagogues. The opposite of this boldness is referred to by the Lord in D&C 60:2–“But with some I am not well pleased, for they will not open their mouths, but they hide the talent which I have given unto them, because of the fear of man.”
7. 2:4–We were allowed of God to be put in trust with the gospel. When was a greater trust than this ever given? Only one message exists in the universe that can bring the children of God back into his presence, and we all are custodians of that message. There are plenty of other voices about, with messages that will lead in other directions (1 Cor. 14:10), but ours is the only one that will allow the eternal reunion of the family of the Father. And he has entrusted us with that message. The very thought is enough to make the knees wobble and the joints turn to water. Imagine having such a trust and then, on judgement day, meeting those who would have received the message if we had had the willingness and courage to proclaim the gospel when we were with them. Imagine a baby-sitter losing one of the children charged to her care while the parents are away. How would She face the father and mother when they came home, knowing she had failed their trust?
8. 2:4–We speak; not as pleasing men, but God. 2 Tim. 4:3 speaks of a time when men will seek for teachers who will tell them what they want to hear, because they have “itching ears.
” This is a prophecy literally fulfilled in our day. People who want to sin can, with little or no effort, find someone who will say that what they want to do is not a sin at all. We have listened to the voices–the LOUD voices–crying for the right to be perverted, sinful, decadent, debased, degenerate. And all of this noise without a shred of embarrassment. Those who want to share the gospel do not tell people what they want to hear. They tell them what they need to hear. Of course, when they find someone for whom those two are the same, then they get to perform baptisms. The Savior exemplifies this quality continuously: notice his challenge to the rich, young ruler in Matthew 19, and his rebuke of the scribes and Pharisees in Matthew 23:23. We sing of this attribute in a hymn: “I’ll say what you want me to say, dear Lord. . .”
9. 2:5–Neither at any time used we flattering words. This is related to the previous two attributes: speaking boldly, and speaking the words of the Lord.
But behold, if a man shall come among you and shall say: Do this, and there is no iniquity; do that and ye shall not suffer; yea, he will say: Walk after the pride of your own hearts; yea, walk after the pride of your eyes, and do whatsoever your heart desireth; and if a man shall come among you and say this, you will receive him and say that he is a prophet. (Hel. 13:27)
We are not permitted to use language that changes people’s actions without changing their hearts. Variations of the verb flatter are used fifty times in the scriptures. And in all three of those it carries the connotation, as it does in all the rest, of getting someone to do something they should not or do not want to do. 1 Thes. 2:11 tells us that Paul and Silas “exhorted and comforted and charged everyone” of their contacts according to their individual needs.
10. 2: 6–Nor of men sought we glory, neither of you, nor yet of others. It is interesting to notice how many times the Savior deferred to his Father, refusing to seek glory for himself, even though he certainly knew that it would come anyway. Look at John 4:34 and Matthew 19:17 for two examples. Those who share the gospel must know that all they offer to the work is their time and their bodies and their minds: things they have covenanted to give anyway. The words are not theirs; the power is not theirs; the glory is not theirs; their talents are not theirs; the converting Spirit is not theirs. It is all a gift. Read Mosiah 2:21-24, which concludes with the question, “therefore of what have ye to boast.“ Benjamin tells us clearly that no matter how long and how much we work, we will still be “unprofitable servants” (Mosiah 2:21).
11. 2:6–We might have been [but were not] burdensome. We had elders in our mission who spent hours every day with members, and who always managed to get invited to lunch. Now I know that the labourer is worthy of his hire, and that those who feed the elders will be blessed, but to contrive to take advantage of the generosity of the members of the church is a sin. Paul refused to be a burden to his investigators and his converts. Members should be expected to keep their covenants and to impart according to the gospel, but they should not be expected to bear missionary burdens.
12. 2:7–We were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her children. “Every man [should lift the warning voice] to his neighbor,” the revelation says, “in meekness and mildness” (D&C 38:41). Sometimes those who share this message, because of their superior knowledge of the gospel, and because of the reverent awe in which they are held by the others, are inclined to be overbearing–to set themselves up as the light, the authority. The correct pattern for this gentleness may be the one demonstrated in John 8:11 when Christ spoke to woman taken in adultery: “Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin more.” The meaning of the word “nurse” in verse 1 Thess. 2:7 is “one who nurses a child,” In virtually every case, this would be the child’s mother. You can watch in your own neighborhoods the gentleness of a mother with a new baby. Her solicitude and awareness and gentleness are powerful testimonies of her love, as is the gentleness of a missionary for investigators and converts.
13. 2:8–So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because you were dear unto us. There are very few pains like the pain that comes when an investigator who has felt the Spirit and shown honest interest in the word suddenly becomes resistant or indifferent. I remember the family who turned us out after all the discussions, and after committing to baptism, while we were in their home filling out the baptismal papers. A strong man and a lovely wife, who knew the work was true and said so, but who were concerned with the response of their families, turned away at the last moment. My companion and I did not leave saying, “That’s a relief. It will free up some time on Sunday so we can get a nap.” We left sobbing, our hearts shattered into a million fragments of biting grief. We had given them more than the word. We had given them our souls. We loved them.
14. 2:9–For ye remember . . . our labor and travail: for laboring night and day, because we would not be chargeable unto any of you, we preached unto you the gospel of God. Missionaries, recognizing the urgency of their message, and the amount of work yet to be done, work as hard as they can. In fact, they are commanded to do so.
Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of God, see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind, and strength, that ye may stand blameless before God at the last day (D&C 4:2).
Joseph and Jacob understood this matter of not being chargeable, of standing blameless. Jacob said:
And we did magnify our office unto the Lord, taking upon us the responsibility, answering the sins of the people upon our own heads if we did not teach them the word of God with all diligence; wherefore, by laboring with our might their blood might not come upon our garments; otherwise their blood would come upon our garments, and we would not be found spotless at the last day (Jacob 1:19, emphasis added).
It pleases me that Joseph and Jacob took “upon [them} the responsibility” and answered “the sins of the people upon [their} own heads.” The sense of the words is that they chose to do it. It was not a condition of their service that was forced upon them.
15.2:10–Ye are witnesses, and God also, how holily and justly and unblameably we behaved ourselves among you that believe.
What a lovely way to summarize this entire collection of attributes: we were holy and just and unblameable.I hope that when our years are done, we will be able to look at our image in the mirror and say the same words, or that our contacts and converts and leaders, when they speak of us, will bear witness of similar qualities in our own missionary service.
It is impossible to be unaware of what the Lord requires of full-time and member missionaries now. It is impossible to be unaware of the divinely delivered obligation to be more serious than most of us have been about our duty to share the messages of salvation with neighbors and friends. It is time now, in a way that it has been time before, open our mouths and bear testimony of what the Lord is doing for his children in these last days.
One week after his baptism, Brigham Young gave his first sermon. He declared, “I wanted to thunder and roar out the Gospel to the nations. It burned in my bones like fire pent up, so I [commeced] to preach . . . Nothing would satisfy me but to cry abroad in the world, what the Lord was soing in the latter days (JD 1:313).
What could be a Louder Voice Than the Voice of Impending Judgments?
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I am embarrassed to admit that I was once a cable news junkie. Like millions of others, I got caught up in the feeding frenzy, the supposed “evidence” of myriad conspiracies and the unconscionable evils of every member of an opposing political party.
By choice, I am an Independent, but I soon discovered that commentators had the skill to sway me. That which had begun as an effort to be informed became a ringside seat to a brawl. Each night I watched combatants put on their gloves and duke it out. Nothing was ever solved, of course, but the audience was entertained. Lots of yelling, sarcasm, interrupting, rudeness and aimless bantering called “debate.” When the commentator struck a deathblow with a well-placed zinger, I could almost hear a collective cheer from TV Land.
Then I read a warning from the Lord.
“Ye hear of wars in far countries, and you say that there will soon be great wars in far countries, but ye know not the hearts of men in your own land.
“I tell you these things because of your prayers; wherefore, treasure up wisdom in your bosoms, lest the wickedness of men reveal these things unto you by their wickedness in a manner which shall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shall shake the earth; but if ye are prepared ye shall not fear” (D&C 38:29-30).
Notice that the Lord did not discount the fact that wickedness will prevail in high places. Scan the prophecies of last days, and you will see that gross wickedness is and will become more prevalent. Are there conspiracies? Yes. Is there corruption? Yes. Will these things become worse? Yes.
What could be worse than civilization spiraling out of control?
Actually, according to the scripture, there is at least one thing that is worse than the wickedness. It is the voice that exaggerates the message of wickedness. Listen to the Lord’s words: “Treasure up wisdom in your bosoms.” Why? “Lest the wickedness of men reveal these things unto you by their wickedness in a manner which shall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shall shake the earth.”
As I understand the scripture, some manipulative individuals in the last days will use their podium to interpret events in an inflammatory manner that carries a louder voice than the voice of the actual events. A fifty-pound problem just became a hundred-pound problem. The voice of judgments that will shake the earth will be deafening, but the louder voice will be the one that gives the play-by-play. And what is the purpose of these individuals? To inflate, exacerbate, cause contention, anger, inflame and basically scare us to death.
The Lord offers a remedy: “If ye are prepared ye shall not fear.”
Since I was a young boy, I was taught that this scriptural phrase had to do with storing food, saving money and getting out of debt. But reading the scripture through another lens, I perceive another level of preparedness that the Lord wants me to consider. “Treasure up wisdom,” He says.
Where does one seek wisdom? Apparently not solely from certain commentators. My dictionary defines wisdom as “the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment.”
Here are some scriptures that point us toward wisdom:
- “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God” (James 1:5).
- “Blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom” (2 Nephi 28:30).
- “And inasmuch as they sought wisdom they might be instructed” (D&C 1:26).
- “And listen to the counsel of him who has ordained you from on high, who shall speak in your ears words of wisdom” (D&C 78:2).
- “Seek not for riches, but for wisdom” (D&C 6:7; 11:7).
Clearly, wisdom is connected to spiritual maturity, sound knowledge and it comes as a gift of the Spirit. “To some is given, by the Spirit of God, the word of wisdom. To another is given the word of knowledge, that all may be wise and to have knowledge” (D&C 46:17-18).
Should we be informed and involved? Of course. Should we prepare for difficult times by storing food, saving money and resisting debt? Certainly. But I have observed that many people who take such precautions do so by taking counsel from the wrong voices, and consequently, they still fear. That is precisely what the Lord informs us will not happen if we prepare with wisdom.
I am intrigued that the apostles and prophets, who actually can see the future and accurately interpret current events, never sound a hopeless warning or fail to show us a clear path to safety. Theirs are authorized voices that have no other motive than to speak for the Lord and bless us. They do not seek ratings, popularity, influence or money. They often speak so softly that one must listen with spiritual ears to hear the thunderous import of the message.
Blessings are associated with seeking wisdom to listen and prepare.
- “Angels did appear unto wise men” (Helaman 16:14).
- “For they that are wise and have received the truth, and have taken the Holy Spirit for their guide, and have not been deceived-verily I say unto you, they shall not be hewn down and cast into the fire, but shall abide the day” (D&C 45:57).
- “And whoso is found a faithful, a just, and a wise steward shall enter into the joy of his Lord, and shall inherit eternal life” (D&C 51:19).
- “He who is faithful and wise in time is accounted worthy to inherit the mansions prepared for him of my Father” (D&C 72:4).
- “And their wisdom shall be great, and their understanding reach the heaven; and before them the wisdom of the wise shall perish, and the understanding of the prudent shall come to naught” (D&C 76:9).
But we still are lured by the honey-tongued orator or the flamboyant commentator who raises his prophetic voice in righteous indignation “in a manner which shall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shall shake the earth.” We rocket their books to the best-seller lists; we flock to stadiums to hear them preach their doctrine; we Tweet their sound bites; we subscribe to their blogs and “like” them of Facebook. And we’re still afraid. Aren’t we taught that false prophets will arise in the last days?
I wonder how we might fare if we gave equal time to the Lord’s servants? “How slow [are men] to walk in wisdom’s paths” (Helaman 12:5).
So now you might be thinking, “Brother Barkdull is certainly not talking about my favorite commentator.” Let me save you some time. I probably am.
“O be wise; what more can I say?” (Jacob 6:12).
I’m bracing for the irate letters.
Offer
It Actually Takes a Village: On Community and Openness
A couple of weeks ago, a young couple, new to our ward, spoke in our sacrament meeting.
The wife spoke openly of her struggle with relatively newly-diagnosed bipolar disorder, and of her husband’s patient kindness and caring for her.
I was deeply impressed, not only by what she said about her husband, but with her. I appreciated her candor. I admired her courage.
I believe that members of the Church are coming to a better understanding of, and to more compassion for, mental and emotional illness and those who suffer from it. Elder Holland’s wonderful remarks during the Saturday afternoon session of October 2013 General Conference were a landmark, as were, earlier, Elder Alexander Morrison’s 2003 book Valley of Sorrow: A Layman’s Guide to Understanding Mental Illness and his 2005 Ensign article on “Myths about Mental Illness.”
I understand the strong social pressures within and without the Church to act as if we’re perfect, as if we have everything together, and the strong personal urge to avoid too much openness, too much vulnerability.
But I also believe that, carried too far, this pretense does us considerable harm. First of all, it can become, essentially, a lie. None of us is really perfect, none of us really has his or her act fully together, and few of us even come close. All of us have insecurities, areas of guilt and feelings of inadequacy. And it’s awfully hard to keep up such a faade. And not, it seems to me, very worthwhile.
As I write, I’m thinking about two friends who are going through a terribly difficult time, something of which most of us who knew them had no inkling until just the past few days. A mutual friend wrote to me today, expressing concern and a desire to help, but also saying that he has typically tended to assume that everything is going swimmingly well for others, just not for him. For that reason, therefore, this recent turn of events in the lives of people we both care about was especially shocking. How can we help? Could we have helped earlier?
I agree. And I’ve noticed the same thing. I sometimes wonder why I’m facing challenges, or why things aren’t going the way I would like for my children. Why is everybody else doing so well? Why do their paths in life seem so effortless and so effortlessly successful? Why not us? But, of course, this is all illusion. Everybody has challenges. As the passage in Susan Evans McCloud’s wonderful LDS hymn reminds us, “In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can’t see.”
I always think, in this context, of the Simon and Garfunkel song “Richard Cory”:
They say that Richard Cory owns one half of this whole town,
With political connections to spread his wealth around.
Born into society, a banker’s only child,
He had everything a man could want: power, grace, and style.
But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I’m living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.
The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes:
Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show.
But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I’m living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.
He freely gave to charity, he had the common touch,
And they were grateful for his patronage and thanked him very much,
So my mind was filled with wonder when the evening headlines read:
“Richard Cory went home last night and put a bullet through his head.
But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I’m living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.
And I think of the earlier poem by Edwin Arlington Robinson (d. 1935), which inspired the song:
Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him:
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.
And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
Good-morning,’ and he glittered when he walked.
And he was rich – yes, richer than a king –
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.
So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head.
And I recall this passage, from Mosiah 18:8-10, about the Book of Mormon prophet Alma:
And it came to pass that he said unto them: Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;
Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life-
Now I say unto you, if this be the desire of your hearts, what have you against being baptized in the name of the Lord, as a witness before him that ye have entered into a covenant with him, that ye will serve him and keep his commandments, that he may pour out his Spirit more abundantly upon you?
I understand the need for privacy, and am not calling for the Church to be transformed into one great boundary-less sensitivity-training session and group hug.
But I do think that too much pretense harms us and prevents the Church from fully carrying out its divinely-appointed mission. Furthermore, acting as if we have to merit admission into heaven rather than to seek entrance via the grace of Christ is plain, unambiguous, heresy.
Years ago, Hillary Clinton published a book entitled It Takes a Village. The title allegedly came from an African proverb: “It takes a village to raise a child.” She came under a great deal of fire from my fellow members of the vast right-wing conspiracy, and I understand why: Most of us aren’t fans of Ms. Clinton, and most of us read her title as really saying “It takes an intrusive and vastly-extended state to raise a child.” But I was very uncomfortable with much of the rhetoric, because, despite my libertarian leanings on political and economic issues, I’m also, at heart, a communitarian. And I think it really does take a “village” to raise a child – and to sustain and nourish the rest of us, too, even after we’ve left childhood long behind.
The Highs and Lows of Missionary Work in El Salvador
Dear Brother Albright,
I have been so impressed with my younger brother and his missionary service in El Salvador. As you may know, El Salvador is ranked by many experts as one of the most dangerous countries in the world. The missionaries and investigators there face many challenges and yet the gospel is rapidly spreading in this densely populated country. I was especially touched by comparing two letters that my brother Coulter sent to our family earlier this year, written just three months apart, showing the highs and lows of missionary work. These letters illustrate the importance of persistence and working through the difficult times and trials faced in the mission field. Such struggles often precede the miracles.
Here are some excerpts from just two of my brothers letters written earlier this year:
First Letter: JANUARY 21, 2013:
Nothing worse then a week where almost every single lesson fell through, and then I got shingles. But it’s all good! More trials, more opportunities to grow. This week was also rough with my companion. I’m really giving it my all. The sores from the shingles are all over my back. I can’t sleep at night which is really hard. Having shingles is the pits!
Really, I dont know what to write, this week was such a killer.
I don’t want to be “Debbie Downer” and I don’t want you guys to think that the mission isn’t amazing. It’s just that sometimes it’s very difficult, and this week was the most difficult week of my entire life.
OK, I just read all that and I probably should erase it all. The mission is the best thing I’ve ever done. I love it and wouldn’t trade this week for anything in the world. I’ve learned so much from these struggles.
I love you guys. You are all in my prayers and thoughts each and everyday. The church is so true. If I wasn’t sure of this, then I wouldn’t be here. But I can say with out any doubt that it is true! We are so blessed. In my worst moments this week I was so blessed to know that I always have someone who I can turn to. I just need to drop to my knees.
Love,
Elder Coulter Reynolds
Second Letter: APRIL 21, 2013 (EXACTLY 3 MONTHS LATER)
I have never enjoyed a happier day in my whole mission! Without a doubt. Yesterday was so marvelous! I was blessed with 35 baptisms yesterday. Usually 1 or 2 baptisms per companionship every month is normal. But our entire zone worked hard together and we actually reached our high goal of 100 baptisms for one month in one zone. I believe this may make us the highest baptizing zone in the world! I worked harder the last 7 weeks then I think I have my whole life put together. I’ve never been more stressed either… but the blessings were so worth it! I love my mission. It is absolutely amazing. We just baptized more people in one day then I have in my whole mission combined.
But it doesn’t end there. After our zone’s large baptismal service, I got permission from the mission president to return back to my first area which I loved so much so that I could baptize my first investigator. I cannot express the joy that I had when I entered the waters of baptism with someone who I challenged to be baptized in my first week in the mission field. My very FIRST investigator. When I saw her and her family again I just fell apart. It was such a grand blessing from the Lord. I cannot express it adequately.. No words can express the joy I felt this day.
I also got to see the whole ward of La Union again. The missionaries told them I was coming and so they all lined up in the entrance to greet me. It was unbelievably marvelous.
All my converts from my first area were there. I was so so happy to see them. I loved every second of it. Life is amazing. The Gospel and the Lord are amazing.
Love,
Coulter Reynolds
Brother Albright, I realize that not all missions have these kinds of incredible numbers, but almost all missionaries will face significant trials and tribulations at some point during their time in the mission field. I felt that my brother’s experiences, just 90 days apart, can give hope to the many missionaries now serving that faith precedes the miracle, and that joy cometh in the morning!
Warm Regards,
Robert Reynolds
Mormon Apostle Speaks on “Big Issues” of Faith, Family, Religious Freedom
The address is a helpful resource that goes hand in hand with the religious freedom materials the Church published online in September.
In his speech (originally given to law school students and alumni in February in Washington D.C.), Elder Holland cites the Pew Forum on Religious Life finding that one in five U.S adults claim no religious affiliation. He notes that Mormons and other believers “must be ever more effective in making the persuasive case for why both religious belief and institutional identity are more relevant than ever and deserve continued consideration and privilege within our society.” (See also “The Relevance of Religion” commentary.)
Elder Holland also speaks of the importance of a family-centered society where parents “nourish a child’s mind and heart and spirit.” He says that, in general, “no community of whatever size or definition has enough resources in time, money, or will to make up for what does not happen at home.” He also suggests that, instead of redefining the meaning of marriage and family, “our age ought to be reinforcing and exalting that which has been the backbone of civilization since the dawn of it.”
Regarding religious freedom, Elder Holland says it’s important to give faith the freedom to flourish, because humans have “both the ability and the responsibility to make choices with the hope – indeed, the confidence – that we will ultimately choose that which benefits the individual and the larger society in which those individuals live.”
Faith, family and freedom, Elder Holland concludes, are “big issues inextricably linked with the hope and promise of democracy.” And they are “intertwined, interlinked, and interlocked so tightly that when one of them is struck, the other two are damaged; so that when one of them is cut, the other two will bleed.”